1+1 Newsletter

18 years ago, I stood in the aisle of an Auto Zone trying to make a simple decision: which kind of windshield scraper should I buy?

How you choose to measure success in life shapes everything—sometimes in ways you would not have predicted.

Leadership guru Patrick Lencioni coined the phrase "disagree and commit" to capture what all high-performing teams do. Behind closed doors, they fiercely debate important issues to get to the truth of the matter. But once a decision has been made, they emerge from the conference room as a united front.

If your goal in life is to be entertained until you die, then embracing The Impulse Zone is the way to go. But if you are trying to give your life to a greater purpose as all humble leaders do, then you would do well to steer clear of this focus vortex. Ask yourself...

The first 39 years of Hiram Grant’s life were a string of disappointments. A lackluster student, he only made it into college thanks to an influential family connection. Although his father was a successful entrepreneur, the over-trusting and under-discerning Hiram lost his savings many times over through failed investments.

Whether you are a recent grad, a soon-to-be-retiree, or just someone who is pondering your path mid-career, I have two pieces of advice for you: keep a notebook, and make two lists.

Sir Michael Caine has lived a remarkable life. Born in the slums of London, the tenacious and witty actor has played major roles in some of my favorite movies (Alfred in the Batman trilogy and Lawrence in Dirty Rotten Scoundrels, to name two). Caine sums up his life philosophy—and the key to much of his success—in three simple words: “Use the difficulty.”

In 1853, an artist you’ve never heard of was born in a backwater town in Western Europe. After failing multiple times to become a minister like his father, the 27-year-old decided to take up painting. Without any formal training in the medium, he dove headlong into it.

Michael Scott might be the most underrated boss of all time. Hear me out.

During my six years as an executive coach, I’ve met a lot of smart leaders. Across the two dozen Fortune 500 companies I’ve partnered with, I’ve met executives who’ve attended Ivy League schools, led billion-dollar enterprises, and been recognized before Congress. And yet as I consider which ones were actually the most effective in their roles, their effectiveness had little to do with their resumes.

Growing up, my attentive parents gave a lot of attention to how the “influences” in my life shaped my character. We talked at length about the music I listened to, the movies I watched, and the friends I hung out with. But now as an adult, I realize there’s one major character influence that I’ve long ignored: my work.

There’s a weird phenomenon that occurs in my house, and I still don’t fully understand it. Sometimes—for no obvious reason at all—my kids do not listen to me.

One of my favorite movies growing up was Back to the Future. I loved seeing Marty McFly—the scrappy, unappreciated underdog—go back in time, beat up the bad guy, and shred a guitar to the tune of Johnny B. Goode.

If we want to be surprised and delighted on a daily basis, we also could benefit from holding high hopes but low expectations.

Discipline isn’t about overpowering your will by sheer force. That’s unsustainable. Instead, it’s about designing an environment and task list that dramatically reduces the friction needed to be effective.

Jim Elliot had all the potential in the world. Born in 1927, young Jim was such a talented thespian and public speaker that many expected him to become a famous actor. But Elliot felt drawn to something more meaningful—and more risky.

Early in my career, I was tasked with launching a social entrepreneurship program for high school students in just eight months. I had from January to August to create, recruit, and execute a program that needed to draw high-potential high schoolers from around the world to our campus outside of Boston, and I had never done anything like this before.

The truth is that most of us are craving that hug from someone. While physical touch may not be your love language—and you might never consider hugging your boss—the reality is that we all want to feel care and connection throughout our day. It may be obvious that we want that at home with our partner and kids, but it’s less intuitive to think that we need it in the workplace, too.

The core idea here is simple: the bigger the change, the longer the on-ramp. If you’re changing the type of copy paper you use in the office, that's no biggie--just notify people in a Friday memo. But if you’re changing your team’s strategy or KPIs or compensation structure, you’d best invite your folks into that discussion sooner and give them more time to adjust to the new reality.

As you think about the people who experience your brand, think about all the people—those inside and outside your company. Creating a truly coherent brand experience for everyone not only maintains your integrity—it also provides a competitive edge and a meaningful contribution to the world.